An apology, 20 years later...

...the most amazing thing happened this weekend which I never thought would, and that is an apology for an event that took place in Junior High which drastically altered my life, an event to which I pinpoint almost everything wrong with me. I'm in awe of this apology not only because it happened, but by how much it made me feel better.

Growing up my best friend was Jessica Fitton. She lived down the road and we were together so much that we were referred to by everyone in the neighborhood as Mr. and Mrs. Pierce. We always worked out having our classes together and I really loved her. She was my best friend. Well, in 8th grade she began hanging out with these snobby girls, particularly Brigette Nielsen who didn't like me and didn't treat me well at all, which was weird, because everybody liked me. One day, as I was going to the table at lunch to sit with Jessica, I could see that Brigette was whispering to Jessica and it was about me as they were both focused on me. When I sat down, I tried to make small talk and then Jessica spoke up and said, "David, you can't sit with us anymore." I asked why not and she said, "Because you're a boy and I'm a girl and we just can't be friends."

Needless to say that obliterated me.

It hurt more than anything that has ever happened before or really since. To me, it felt like she was saying I was totally worthless and not even good enough for anybody and I suppose I harbored that feeling causing me to eat myself into comfort and my "husky" size not to mention I didn't want to ever feel like that again at the hand of some girl that I loved, which means I've tried my hardest not to fall in love with someone because I knew what they were capable of, and that came true with Rachel...but anyway....I still went to school with Jessica through high school and it was horrible seeing her there because I just felt so stupid and I really missed her. We've seen each other occasionally over the years and we've been cordial and all, but I've always had hurt when I've seen her.

I've always thought she never gave it a single thought until this weekend when on Facebook I posted a message asking people to name a memory they had of me. She replied with the following:

So many memories! Probably the most memorable was when I would steal my dad's cowboy books and come down and read the sex scenes to you and Paul! Also, in Jr. High when I thought I was too cool to hang out with you, little did I know that you were too cool for me! Sorry about that, I was jerk!

I was floored!! Her apology came out of nowhere! I take this to mean that her actions have been gnawing on her ever since then and it's taken 20 years for her to actually say she was sorry! I honestly was so taken back. It makes me feel better to hear it. True, I still wish it had never happened, but kids are dumb and I'm very glad she apologized. Now I can save all that money on therapy that I was going to have to do:)